Dropping so hot it’s turned pan-water to steam, Dumptionary.com are delighted to present to you yet another smattering from our chilly northern correspondent Barles Glaswin.

Blatantly still under the heady influence of Tony Robbins, Barles recounts the heart-warming story of the Kenny G as seen through his eyes.

The sharper-eyed members of the anal-isys team were particularly excited with the sweetcorn quotient in this puppy.

Our very own poet laureate, Barles Glaswin, has imparted on us another fine tale in Barles’ Special Species. The fourth in the serial, we take you to the charming village of Darrowby and proffer an enchanting insight into: All Creatures Great and Small. Enjoy!

Updated.Correct pic has now been supplied, Thank you Chargel!

That’s right dirt fans. We’re doing the unthinkable.

The flood gates are now open (quite literally), and we want to see your efforts! Send in your pics here wipes@dumptionary.com and make your little splash in the toilet bowl of history. All entries are, of course, anonymous, and would no doubt brighten up the site. If you like brown. You know what we’re looking for – an explanation of the inspiration for your train of thought and a picture of the dirty little deed itself.

If you are lacking in imagination or literary skill, our very own Barles Glaswin on the Creative Licence Desk here at Dumptionary Towers will more than gladly oblige to add colour to your prose. And Poo.

Have at it dear readers – and don’t strain an aneurysm.

The Dumptionary Team